i just love hypocrites

you know the kind...the people who preach a variety of things to anyone who will or will not listen, but at the same time do just the opposite of what they are claiming to advocate. i had a nice run-in with that today. it always makes me laugh to see it, too. ah, yes, it gives me a warm fuzzy feeling inside just to know that i, at least, can realize that they're doing it while they are completely oblivious, or just ignorant.

anyway, i'm still waiting on the word from a few different people, each about something different.

i wish i had the guts to have just talked to him. me and my embarassment about simple things. oh well, i will comfort myself in believing that nothing would have come from it anyway. nothing but my saying something stupid. as much as i know that is what probably would have happened, i know there was still a chance he would have said everything i want him to. damn. take a risk, meg. next time perhaps...

i have the next two days off and i'm not sure what i'm going to do for them. i'll probably go down to the pool tomorrow and try lying out again, hopefully with a result close to the previous time. other than that, i will try to enjoy my time away from work. i was close to freaking out this morning. i guess that is what happens when you get stuck working with a brand new kid without anyone else even though there are supposed to be three people working mornings. thank you, matt wilson. and i swear, the next time i see matt press, i'm going to beat the shit out of that little prick. ben needs to fire him. i pretty much told him that today, but the closest i could get was having him send matt press home if he ever did show up this afternoon. i hope he either didn't show up or he did get sent home. i would prefer him having not shown up and not called because then he'd be supposedly fired...finally.

i think i'm dealing with all of this pretty well considering what's happened in the last few days. i've had periods of being close to a nervous breakdown, but i never did and other than those bouts, i've been absolutely fine. things are better this way and i'm coming to realize that more and more with every day that passes.